Hey everyone, Chris Parker and Kristen Ishihara here of Ishihara and Parker Law Firm Texas. Today, we're diving into a topic that a lot of people avoid: how to handle estate planning when you have an estranged child. It’s a tough subject, but an important one, and we’re here to walk you through it.

What Does "Estranged" Mean?

Estrangement can mean different things for different families. Maybe you have a child you haven’t spoken to in years due to a falling out. Perhaps there was a difficult divorce, and you lost contact. It could even be a child you gave up for adoption. Regardless of the situation, the question remains—how do you plan your estate with an estranged child in mind?

A common misconception is that an estranged child is automatically excluded from inheritance. That’s not the case. If you don’t clearly state your wishes in your estate plan, Texas law will divide your assets among your legal heirs, which may include that child.

Estate Planning While You're Alive

Before we talk about what happens after you pass, let’s discuss what you can do while you’re still here.

1. Power of Attorney (POA) Matters

If you have an estranged child, the last thing you want is for them to suddenly step in and make decisions for you if you become incapacitated. This is why it’s crucial to have your power of attorney documents set up correctly. Choose someone you trust to handle medical and financial decisions on your behalf.

2. Avoiding Financial Manipulation

If an estranged child—or their child (your grandchild)—suddenly comes back into your life, you need to be mindful of financial decisions. It’s easy to feel guilty and overcompensate by giving gifts or money, which can disrupt your estate plan.

What Happens When You Pass Away?

Now, let’s talk about the big question: what to do with an estranged child in your will or trust.

1. Decide Whether to Leave Them Anything

You have options. You can:

• Leave them an equal share as your other children.
• Leave them a smaller percentage.
• Disinherit them entirely.

If you choose to leave them out, it’s important to explicitly state that in your will rather than just omitting their name. This helps prevent legal challenges down the road.

2. Avoiding Probate Complications

If you leave an estranged child something—whether it’s a little or a lot—your executor will have to track them down and notify them. This can create headaches for your trusted executor, especially if that child is difficult to locate or refuses communication.

Some people think leaving a child "a dollar" is a clever way to cut them out, but in reality, it forces your executor to involve them, potentially inviting legal trouble.

3. Using a Trust for Privacy

A revocable living trust can be a great tool to manage an estranged child’s inheritance (or lack thereof) privately. Unlike a will, which must go through probate (a public legal process), a trust keeps things private and efficient.

Final Thoughts

Every family situation is unique, and estate planning is not one-size-fits-all. The most important thing is to make your wishes crystal clear—whether that means including an estranged child or leaving them out.

And remember, estate plans aren’t permanent! You can update them as relationships change. The key is having a plan in place so that your assets go where you want them to, with as little stress as possible for your loved ones.

If you have any questions or need help crafting the right plan for your situation, feel free to reach out. Estate planning is about protecting your legacy and ensuring your wishes are honored.

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